This time of year drains me.
Frozen then suddenly thawed. Rushing to get done what needs doing now. Planning for the summer. Booking camps, cottages, summer get a-ways to sandy spaces and empty places.
Heavy boots clomping on my feet – weighing me down as I trudge up stairs, down store aisles, along slushy sidewalks. Gravity is still functioning all too well. Especially when I slip on dark unexpected icy patches.
Night still comes much too soon leaving me in the dark when I would stand outside to catch my breath. Stars are lovely and so is the moon – unfortunately the constant clouds make that just wishful thinking. I don’t mind the dark as much when the world is snow-shrouded and reflective. This mid-winter thaw has taken away the snow and any hint of light. It is darkness and fog tonight.
Dinner done. Laundry done. Dishes done. Every day is a constant list of to-do and done. Time for some port and a book and the gas fireplace. Time to just let the day unwind and fade away into snippets and moments to be digested in dreaming later. Much later. There are still things that need doing.
My little cat thinks it strange that I have paused here on my couch so early in the evening. Between the chores and the laser pointer playing on this dark January evening. He gives his toy mouse a shake to ask if there is some mistake. The only other sound is the gentle clack of my keyboard as I type. This couch is lovely, dark and deep but I have chores to do and hours to go before I sleep. And hours to go before I sleep.