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Poem: Ambivalence


 

to the left
to the right
in the black
in the white
i really can’t choose
how i should move
and so here i sit
pondering every bit
of the issues issuing
from endless social
or anti-social media
telling me i need to bleed
better not breed
or feed
or read
or lead
or dare to succeed
get my head freed
into some weed
the cloud above
the blue cloud we love
is where it is at
be proud and loud in the crowd
what the hell
how the hell
should i know
any thing
any way
any day
like every day it just goes
round and down into the ground
confusing my conscientious consciousness
con cussing and con swearing constantly
impairing the comparing
until i can’t stand it
demand it end
come on!
demand it end
go on!
demand it
end it!

no more of this
no more of that
time to be humanized
and realized just as we fantasized
in truth and love and respect
where the hell is the respect
we expect to project and protect
from the
best better bestest
of the rest of us?
we are battered tattered
scattered from what mattered
bleeding hate
wanting love
we are broken
black and blue
unable to decode
what is truly true

so i sit here
doing nothing
mr public on the sideways
of the highways out of the fray
cause i am afraid to speak
i am too weak to be involved
leave me be over here
side lined hidden hiding away
don’t look
don’t see
don’t hear
nope nadda no way

what you say?
you talking to me?
i me
i mean we
i
hell i i i

i
got
nothing.

 

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