2022
boldly kicked the old year out
2021

new year has arrived
and yet still somehow I think
2021

nothing seems to change
I am convinced this remains
2020 too.

Growing up on the farm.
Black and white TV telling me stories via rabbit ears.
I was certain that I could be the next Tarzan of the Jungle.
The snowy screen showing me dreams I’d never create on my own.

Eventually I realized my many gaps
How my grasp of Great Ape grammar was lacking
and my basic Chimpanzee was none existent.

Still I did try to master vine swinging;
and tree-top jumping
while summoning elephants to my aid.

The elephants never came.
The ground turned out to be quite unforgiving.
Still not all was lost!

My climbing became quite excellent!
I learned how to shimmy up drain pipes to rooftops;
Discovered how to corner climb walls.

Then I discovered freedom and the ability
to sneak out my second story window in the old farmhouse;
Catwalk in the darkness to sit 50 feet above that unforgiving ground;

Above the branches;
On the peak of the roof.
There I watched the stars circling;
Shooting stars dispensing wishes.
And saw how the planets kept track of cosmic time.

I decided I wanted to be reach beyond the broadcast jungle
and become the new Carl Sagan…

I never quite made it as Carl.

In the end my dream of Tarzan
took me above and beyond the treetops.

Fragile in your solitude
contentment contained
in your contemplation
by the window
I interrupted

unexpected strangers
we first met scrambling
eggs for breakfast
awkward intercourse
you in a borrowed shirt
uncertain of where
you precisely were
in this moment…

I made you orange juice
freshly squeezed
trying not to notice
the undone buttons
perked coffee in hand
as we talked about
the weather ahead
while your gentleman
slept unaware

Your shy smile making me wish
I had met you yesterday.

It really wasn’t that big of a deal but we can have a good time at the end of the day.
I don’t think you can do anything for me or you that would be of any consequence.
And then you turn off your phone at the end of the day so that you can get away.
It really didn’t matter.
It never works out.
Don’t worry about it.

Don’t even think any more.

red and black squares
marking my path
one step ahead
no moving back
avoiding mad horses
castles and queens
I am too small
to even be seen.